Recipe for Recovery

This list is based on the one in the book Resurrection After Rape. I added a few things of my own, put it in bullet point form, and basically summarized what the book said.

• Determination to heal

-“I think we have to have determination in order to seek out the painful issues that we shrink away from—in order to conquer them.”

• Recognition of what you’ve done yourself

-Realize all the progress you’ve made and obstacles you’ve overcome and be proud!

• Honesty with yourself

-“Writing the facts as they present themselves… not just the ones we are willing to disclose because we are afraid of having to hash them out in session.”

• LOTS of patience!

-Patience with yourself and your progress

-Patience with the person trying to help guide you (they don’t know what’s in your head unless you tell them!)

-Patience with the people you’re close to

-And most importantly, patience with the process.

“Don’t give up. Recovery is not a straight course, but a zig-zag pattern pf success, relapse, despair, and more success. If sometimes you struggle, if you falter, you are normal. More than you know.”

• Nurturance for yourself

-Treat yourself kinder and use your nurturing tools when dealing with yourself.

“Be gentle with yourself.”

• Hope

-Hope that you will get better and reach recovery,

-For brighter days,

-That you will truly love who you are as a person,

-That you can see your worth as a human being, and

-Hope that you can make other lives better, because of who you are.

• Learning to love the person that you are now/Loving who you are at this time

-You are just as important as any other person in this world

-You deserve to be loved both unconditionally and with respect

-You deserve love despite the circumstances

-"Loving what we can accomplish as a survivor."

•"Remember to be merciful to yourself, rather than sifting through the mistakes of your past and condemning yourself for them."

-"You are not wicked, and you are not without value. You may find it hard to believe at times, but there are people who will know your story and yet look you in the eyes with pure respect and acceptance. Do not forget to do that for yourself, AND for others you meet along the way who may have stumbled."

-"Survivorhood is built from a never-ending process of forming linkages between merciful people who see one another as humans, not as person-shaped collections of flaws."

•Positive music

•"We need to admit when it is we need help, when we are struggling, when it gets too big for us. We need to take action when this happens."